In supervision last week, we discussed the trepidation I have been feeling around these early stages of starting my own business. It’s scary doing something completely new, and it’s fascinating that I’m experiencing this in parallel with some of my coachees.
While the process of setting up your own business is simple enough to follow in the UK, going out on your own takes a lot of energy. It can mean a lot of trial and error, for example creating your own workflows, processes and support system. This can sometimes be taken for granted when working for someone else, where you might have an inbuilt team with established ways of working. More significantly for me, the psychological barriers can be huge and the potential to self-sabotage just as big. Sometimes it can feel safer to stay put and not shout about your big new venture.
It was an interesting conversation because, among other things, I realised that I see myself as brave and this makes things harder when I can’t get past things being scary - my ego may get in the way. In other parts of life I will take chances to throw myself off bridges with just a bungee cord for safety, or out of a plane just for a thrill and great views (brave, or stupid?!) but when it comes down to it, I find it hard to do things that are more meaningful because the stakes feel higher. Does that resonate with you?
I’ve been reflecting since that supervision session. Until now, I have dealt with those wilder things by ‘feeling the fear and doing it anyway’, impishly sticking my tongue out at fear while quaking inside until it’s over. It does work but it’s not really listening to why that fear is happening in the first place. After all, fear is protective, a survival mechanism that helps us to stay safe. But staying safe can sometimes hold back the growth I’m looking for, and I couldn’t get around the fear of failure of the business by thumbing my nose at it: there was too much at risk.
Understanding the fear and meeting it helps me to have a more sustainable approach to making big changes. Running your own business is scary! It’s full of unknowns. It really does feel like a bungee jump. In this scenario, though, realising I have a wealth of experience of having my own back is like my own bungee cord. This feels different from my previous approach, because I now know that I’m equipped, and can now begin the real work of figuring out how I can move forward. I can feel the fear, and have evidence for why I’ll be ok. So now, over to you:
How do you relate to the scariness of starting something new?
maybe you're nervous about planning a new job, a promotion, settling down, branching out or something similar?
What might be stopping you from making the change you want to make?
look honestly within: what are your thoughts and feelings about the change?
What could be your ‘bungee cord’?
what is your evidence for succeeding in the past? How could that help you move toward your goal?
If you need a little help in moving forward, book a Getting to Know You call to find out how we can work together to make the jump.
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